Entry 9: Video

[scentbombed]

[Well, nothing to cheer a lady up like suddenly growing a-- n interesting new flood! Do not adjust your speakers, fair viewers: it's not that Kirk has suddenly developed an unusual accent, it's that Angua von Uberwald has suddenly developed a handsome 5 o'clock shadow and a whole lot of other things.

He sort of looks like he's trying not to die laughing.]

All right, lads. Does anyone have a spare set of trousers around? Some of you may already have discovered this, but ladies' leather breeches are not made to accommodate.

Comments

[huge_egomd]

No, I don't imagine the jeans would be any more 'accommodating' than the breeches.

Well, at a guess, you either got roofied by a woman with a taste for leather--if so, congratulations--or the weird shit has hit the fan again. Either seems equally plausible.

[scentbombed]

It'd be the latter. What's a roofie?

[huge_egomd]

Figures. Is there anything normal on this tub?

Rohypnol. It's a drug that makes the victim more cooperative and wipes out their memory. Used by losers who can't get laid any other way.

[scentbombed]

Urgh. And you think this is unsettling?

[huge_egomd]

Just a little. I suppose it's a matter of what you're used to.

...Not that I have ever used roofies. Even I'm not that screwed up.

[scentbombed]

I think I've never been happier to say, "No, it's a damn flood."

[huge_egomd]

Understandable. But you're still stuck with women's clothing.

[scentbombed]

Well, there are ways to deal with that, but I'm hoping someone will just lend me some trousers.

[huge_egomd]

These things don't usually last long, right? So you could just go clothing optional for a few days. [Apparently House is intent on turning the ship into a nudist colony :| ]

Mind if I ask who you are when you aren't a man in ladies' clothing?

[scentbombed]

I think I'll pass. [She spends enough time randomly naked on this boat. She's over it.] My name's Angua von Uberwald. If you see Jim Kirk about today... well, I look like that.

[huge_egomd]

[House needs to get out more. Apparently he's missing all the fun. And all the nudity.]

Afraid I haven't met Mr. Kirk, in any form. And I think I'll wait until everyone changes back before I try putting faces to names. Less confusing that way.

[scentbombed]

[Well, if you catch Angua just after a Change...] Fair enough. Who are you? And do you always look like this?

[huge_egomd]

Name's Greg House, and I usually look like Sean Connery. I'm just having a bad face day today.

[scentbombed]

Who?

[huge_egomd]

[...one of these days he'll get used to the fact not everyone is from Earth.]

A sexy Scotsman, an actor on my world...which is probably irrelevant to you.

Bottom line, yes, I am wearing my original body.

[scentbombed]

Afraid so. I'm from the Disc. I'm not sure what a Scotsman is, and we're not very friendly to actors.

But it's nice to meet you, Greg.

[huge_egomd]

No one's friendly to actors, except the groupies, obviously. And I take it the Disc is a planet...?

Same here. Though, in the interest of full disclosure, I should tell you your opinion will change once you actually get to know me.

[scentbombed]

I find that's true of most people, don't you? [Not that she really tries, with most. She probably won't try with you either, House, sorry. :C] And yes, it's a planet.

[huge_egomd]

I do, actually. I find the less I take people at face value, the less I'm disappointed. [House is cool with lack of trying. In general, he prefers it.]

[scentbombed]

Well, I'm a cop, so it's pretty much my job to assume everyone I meet is a lying bastard. Incidentally, where were you between seven and eight last night?

...Sorry, that's an old and very bad police joke.

[huge_egomd]

[It would probably be a bad idea to admit there may come a time when he will have to provide an alibi]

It's a safe assumption. Not everyone's a bastard but they are all liars.

[scentbombed]

Not everyone. But most people, yes.

[huge_egomd]

Yes, everyone. Everyone lies, and if you believe differently, well, then I truly hope you are my next arresting officer.

[scentbombed]

I know it sounds hard to believe, but I honestly know someone who doesn't. He really does always tell the truth. Always. [Honestly, it can get a little annoying.]

[huge_egomd]

Always? [House believes this would be more than a little annoying.] That doesn't sound like much fun. Please tell me this person isn't on the ship.